Juliet Marillier - Wildwood Dancing

“Trying to fill a lake with your tears?” A little voice spoke up right beside me, making me start. I looked down. There was Dr˘agu¸ta, in a long cloak of tattered green and a hat of leaves, under which her white hair shone like moonbeams. Around her neck she wore an ornament of tiny bones threaded on a cord.

“I got it wrong, didn’t I?” I said, wiping my nose. “I messed it up.”

The witch grinned. In the undergrowth not far away, a pure white snake raised its head to stare at me: I had no doubt that it was her creature in another form, for its eyes were just the same. “Mess and mend,” Dr˘agu¸ta said. “Lose and find.

Change and change again. The solution was right at your fingertips, and you never saw it, Jena. Now it’s moving farther away every day. Best wake up soon, or it’ll be beyond your reach.”

315

“What solution? What do you mean?”

“Sometimes you have to let go. Sometimes you should hold on with all the strength you’ve got. And you have a lot of strength, Jena—too much for your own good, sometimes.” She clicked her fingers; the snake wriggled toward her, hissing.

She stooped and it flowed up her arm to settle around her shoulders like an exotic garment. Then she marched off into the forest without another word, and the shadows swallowed the two of them.

At that moment a horn sounded from down by Ileana’s little pavilion. At last it was time for the royal audience. As I made my way across the sward, I found that I had a companion. The green-eyed man was walking beside me, a discreet distance away, not saying a word.

“What do you want?” I snapped, fighting an urge to move closer.

He remained silent; the look he gave me was gravely assessing. We advanced side by side. Although he kept a decorous arm’s length away, my whole body felt his presence as if we were touching—as if we were walking arm in arm, like sweethearts. My face was hot; I knew I was blushing. I kept my eyes straight ahead. I had to keep my sisters safe. I could not afford to weaken.

Ileana was seated on her throne, the long train of her gown arranged artistically around her feet. Marin stood beside her, the lanterns turning his hair to brilliant gold. He needed no crown to show his royal status. Standing on tiptoe and craning my neck over a mass of shoulders, I caught a glimpse of Tati in her gossamer gown, white arms stretched out in supplication.

316

“. . . and nobody will tell me where he is,” she was saying.

“I must know! I have to find him!”

“Ah, true love,” said Ileana with a little knowing smile, and a ripple of laughter went around the gathered crowd. I tried to get through to the front, but the throng was too tightly packed, and I stumbled. Almost before I could draw breath, Gogu’s hand was there at my elbow, steadying me. A moment later he was alongside me, clearing a way for us to go through. Folk took one look at him and simply moved aside.

“Thanks,” I muttered ungraciously. We halted at the front, he behind me.

“Please help us, Your Majesty.” Tati’s voice was trembling.

“Tell me where Sorrow went, so I can look for him. He’s all alone. He needs me.”

“Child,” Ileana said, “do you recognize the gravity of what you intend to do? Do you know what a human woman must sacrifice to wed one of our kind? You are young. You will have suitors aplenty in your own world. Give this up. Sorrow is gone. If he did not keep faith with you, why should you do any more for him?”

Tati clenched her fists. “You’re lying,” she told the queen.

A ripple of shock ran around the circle. “I know Sorrow wouldn’t turn his back on me. If he’s not here, there must be another explanation. Anyway, we think maybe he’s not one of your kind.

Jena saw a vision: it looked as if he and his sister were human children captured by the Night People. That means he’s the same kind as me. You can’t forbid us to be together—”

“May I speak?” I interrupted. I had seen the look in Ileana’s eyes. I knew I must stop Tati before she angered the queen 317

beyond helping us. I had never witnessed one of Ileana’s rages, but the folk of the Other Kingdom spoke of them with awe.

Her screams had been known to crack ice and make birds fall from the trees. “Your Majesty, perhaps you know that my sister and I crossed over at Dark of the Moon last month. It was not a very wise thing to do, but Tatiana was concerned about Sorrow’s safety.”

“And you had your own reasons, no doubt, Jenica.” Ileana’s pale blue eyes bored into me, seeking out my most carefully guarded thoughts.

“I wanted information,” I said cautiously. “I’d been invited to look in Dr˘agu¸ta’s magic mirror.” I heard a gasp from the assembled folk; this meant something to them. “I thought if I could see the future I might be able to change things, Your Majesty. That was foolish—I know that now.”

“What did you see in this mirror? Enlighten us, Jenica.”

Ileana’s tone was quite chilly.

“What Tatiana told you. Sorrow and a little girl as children, and the leader of the Night People offering them shelter when they were lost. I saw that same girl at the Dark of the Moon gathering. It alarmed me that such a young person should be exposed to the evil things I saw there. It is hard to believe that world exists alongside yours, Your Majesty. Until we crossed over, we had no idea of it.”

“And what else did this magic mirror show you?”

“I . . .”

“Come on. You went there—you let temptation rule you.

Tell the truth!” Suddenly she was on her feet: tall, fell, and terrible. The glade seemed to darken.

318

“I saw this young man, the one who is standing behind me.

As I watched, this mask of—of ordinariness—slipped off, and there was a terrible creature underneath. A creature that belonged there, in Tadeusz’s dark world. He . . . I saw him do some cruel things, Your Majesty. Things that turned my blood cold.”

I could not look at Gogu.

“You are telling us that the creature you have carried close to you all these years—the little frog who enjoyed our midnight frolics and journeyed among us held safely on your shoulder—is a monster beneath the surface?”

Misery shrank my voice to a whisper. Without looking, I could sense Gogu’s utter stillness. We had not been so close all those years for nothing. “That’s the way it seems. When Dr˘agu¸ta turned him back into a man, that’s the man he was. I think it was all some kind of cruel joke.” I pulled myself together. “But I’m not here to ask about that, Your Majesty. Tati and I are deeply concerned about Sorrow and his sister. I understand that even if they are human folk, they have been in the Other Kingdom too long now to come back to our world. I saw Sorrow jump off a high parapet at Piscul Dracului. No human man could do that and survive. I understand that perhaps, after so many years, they have become something very like the Night People. But, Your Majesty, if you could find a place for them in your own realm, safe from those who hold them in thrall, that would be much better than leaving them where they are. That little girl is almost a woman: I don’t like to think what might become of her. . . .”

“Ah,” said Ileana. “You are able to see somewhat more broadly than I gave you credit for, Jenica. Good. You realize, of course, that nothing comes without a cost.”

319

“So folk keep telling me.”

“You may have to give up something precious, Jena. Something very dear to your heart.”

I was five years old again, and offering my crown. I want to be Queen of the Fairies.

“Can it be done, Your Majesty?” Tati breathed. “Can you bring them here?”

“Sorrow’s gone,” said Ileana flatly. “You weren’t listening, Tatiana.”

“Nor were you!” Tati’s voice was rising. “I told you, he loves me! He’ll come back for me—I know he will!”

“Love, hope, trust,” Marin said lightly. “These are strong in you, Tatiana: so strong, your belief in them seems almost foolish. Are they so important?”

Tati squared her frail shoulders and lifted her chin.

“They’re everything,” she said, and her voice rang out around Dancing Glade like a clear bell. “That’s what life is all about—

love and loyalty, truth and trust. I’m not giving that up. And I’m not giving Sorrow up. Tell me where he is. Tell me what I have to do to find him.”

Behind me, Gogu shifted. I glanced up. He had a funny look in his eyes, and his fingers were by my shoulder, close to the place where he was once accustomed to sit under the shelter of my hair. I edged away, alarmed by how badly I wanted him to touch me. His hand fell back to his side, and his face went blank.

“Well spoken, Tatiana,” Ileana said, a little smile curving her lips. “You have passed the first part of your test. The second 320

requires that you maintain hope for somewhat longer, for Sorrow is indeed gone—gone far away. As it happens, we have made an arrangement with the Night People. We were very displeased that they did not keep their bloody activities outside this valley. We have watched over your small community since time before time. We do not indulge in senseless acts of violence; wanton bloodletting sickens us, whether it be of human folk or creatures. In Tadeusz’s world it is different. His exists alongside mine—indeed, within the Other Kingdom are many worlds. At Full Moon dancing, you sisters have seen but the merest sliver of our realm. You were young when we first admitted you here, young and vulnerable. We showed you what was appropriate. When you chose to visit Tadeusz’s world, you entered a far different place. In your world and in ours, darkness and light exist side by side.”

She turned and beckoned, and one of her attendants—a tall woman clad in dry beech leaves, with wisps of fern tangled into her hair—came forward, with a pale-faced girl by her side.

The girl was all in black. She looked much as she had when last I saw her—dazed, unseeing—but there was more color in her face now, as if a long frost was starting to thaw.

“We bargained for Silence here,” Ileana said. “I share your concerns, Jenica. She is with us until her brother can achieve the quest we have set him. Much rides on it. Sorrow has three prizes to win, should he fulfill his task in time.”

Tati stood silent, waiting for more. I could see her trembling.

“He has until midnight at next Full Moon to execute it and 321

return. Fail, and he must leave our forest forever. If he prevails and returns in time, he will win his sister’s release to my realm and my rule. The Night People will move away from our valley.

And we will give Sorrow permission to bring you across, Tatiana, and to dwell with you among us as man and wife.”

“Oh . . . oh, thank you,” said Tati, clasping her thin hands together. “Thank you . . .”

My heart was hammering. I had wanted Tati to get her answers, but not this. This just could not be. “My lady,” I blurted out. “Your Majesty . . . this is not right. Don’t you realize what it would mean, if my sister wed Sorrow? She’d have to leave our world forever. Our father is very sick, perhaps dying. This could be the final blow for him—” I saw Tati’s eyes fill with tears. Ileana’s regal features became glacial, but I didn’t seem to be able to stop myself. “You can’t allow this! There has to be another way!”

“Of course, Sorrow may not succeed in the quest,” Ileana said crisply. I wilted under her stare. “We made it difficult, in recognition of the value of the reward. If he never returns, or does so without fulfilling our requirements, you can keep your sister. For you are right: Sorrow and Silence have been here too long to go back to the human world. Each has developed qualities that would lead to great trouble if they tried to return.