Teresa Southwick - When A Hero Comes Along

She cleared her throat, then said, “I recommend a hamburger.”

He nodded, and she ordered two. They got drinks from the fountain dispenser, then filed by the cashier and Kate insisted on paying because of her employee discount.

When they were facing each other across a table, she cut her hamburger in half. Anything to keep her hands busy. Unfortunately, the movement also highlighted the fact that they were shaking. “So—I didn’t expect to see you so soon.”

“It was bound to happen.”

“Because of J.T.,” she said.

“Because Southwestern Helicopter Service is my company and we have the contract for medical evacuation with Mercy Medical Center.”

“I knew that.” It was another reason she’d half expected to see him when his tour of duty ended. “I just figured as owner of the company, you were running the show from behind a desk.”

“No way.” He shook his head. “The way I see it, anyone who doesn’t want to fly is crazy.”

Mentally she raised her hand for a free pass to the psych ward. She liked both feet on the ground, thank you very much. One irreconcilable difference in the con column and she suspected there would be more. Part of the problem was that she didn’t know how many more. She’d spent several sizzling weeks with this man and talking hadn’t been high on her list of things to do with him. But the list had changed. He was J.T.’s father and she knew very little about him, except that he’d charmed her into breaking her rules, then disappeared and broke her heart. That’s what happened when you didn’t follow the rules. She wouldn’t be making that mistake again.

“I see,” she said.

Without cutting it in half, he took a manly bite of his burger, then chewed. “So, who watches J.T. while you’re at work?”

Probably he’d have asked that even if she hadn’t mentioned their son a few moments ago. And she was going to cut him a break on the slightly judgmental tone in his voice and chalk it up to her imagination, aggravated by guilt from leaving her son in order to make a living and put a roof over his head. “I have someone.”

“I guess you checked out this someone?”

“Of course. She’s mature. A grandmother.” When she noticed the look on his face, she added, “A young grandmother. She has references.”

Joe finished his hamburger while she picked at hers and made crumbs out of the bun. Without consciously forming the thought, Kate had known that Joe showing up would complicate her life. But this conversation was making her uneasy. Somewhere she’d heard that the best defense was a good offense. Although whoever had said it probably wasn’t facing off with an honest-to-goodness warrior.

“Look, Joe, I’m not sure exactly what you’re getting at. But I’ve got questions, too. Like, why didn’t you call before coming by last night?”

He shrugged. “I’m a fly-by-the-seat-of-the-pants kind of guy.”

“And I’m a feet-on-the-ground and plan-everything-out kind of girl.”

“Not when we were together,” he said, heat blazing in his eyes.

He was right about that. From the time she was old enough to understand that her mother chose one loser after another, Kate had promised herself that she wouldn’t make the same mistakes. She would do things in a practical, orderly way. She would fall in love, get married, and after a reasonable length of time, probably two years, they would have a baby.

Then she’d met Joe. He came into Mercy Medical’s E.R. for stitches in his hand and laid his follow-me-into-sin grin on her. She’d known she was flirting with danger, but the excitement of it was irresistible. She couldn’t believe that a man like him was interested in Candy Carpenter’s only daughter and for once she silenced the practical voice that warned her to run far, run fast. Instead, she’d run straight into his arms for a magical month.

Then he’d simply said it was over and he was deploying for a year. After that, she’d buried her pain behind an it-serves-me-right attitude and figured she got off with a cheap lesson. Mostly she believed that until she found out she was pregnant and had made the mother of all mistakes—pardon the pun. But that didn’t mean she was like her mother. She took care of herself, all by herself. And that’s the way she liked it.

“We were together a long time ago,” Kate said. “And a lot has changed since then.”

“Yeah.” Shadows slid through his eyes as he nodded. “You had my baby.”

“And I wouldn’t trade him for anything,” she said fiercely. “I love that child more than I ever imagined it was possible to love anyone. Everything I do, every decision I make is for him.”

“Okay. But I’m back now. If I’d been here…”

What would have been different? He’d dumped her. So what if it had taken her a while to let him know he was going to be a father? The decision was huge. Her own father had skipped out before she was old enough to remember him and Kate had often wondered why he’d bothered to marry her mom in the first place if he didn’t plan to stick around. Joe had just done the not-sticking-around part up front.

Finally she said, “It’s okay, Joe. It’s not your fault you couldn’t be here for J.T.”

“But I’m here now.”

“Yeah.” And they needed to talk about what that meant. Real soon. But she wasn’t ready yet.

“I want to do the right thing, Kate.”

“What does that mean?”

More importantly, did she really want to hear this?

The uneasy feeling grew in her chest until she had trouble drawing in air. J.T. was hers. She could take care of him, support him, raise him to be a good man. She didn’t want or need anyone’s help for J.T. to be healthy and happy. If she didn’t let anyone else in, the chances of keeping him happy went up. If she did it herself, she would know it was done right because she would always be there for him.

She looked at Joe and braced herself. “Define the right thing.”

“We should get married.”

Kate was just taking a drink from her iced tea and nearly choked. “Don’t you know it’s not nice to make a joke when someone’s drinking?”

Joe wasn’t being funny. He was dead serious, although he hadn’t intended to propose. If he’d planned it, there would have been flowers and candles, not harsh fluorescent lights. And the food would be better than flame-broiled cardboard with a shot of cholesterol. But now that the thought was out there, it felt right.

“I’m not joking. We should get married,” he said.

“No, we shouldn’t.” She stabbed at the ice in her cup with the straw.

“Why not?”

“Do you really want me to start? The thing is, I only get a half hour for lunch,” she said.

Irritation knotted inside him. He didn’t remember her being this sarcastic. But then, all his memories were from before he’d told her they were over. She probably had reason to give him a hard time. Likely it’d be a good idea to let her get this out of her system.

“Take your best shot,” he said. “Give me one good reason why it would be wrong.”

“Just one?” she said, staring at him.

“For starters.”

“Okay.” She nodded thoughtfully. “Here’s one. We hardly know each other.”

“So marriage will give us a chance to get acquainted.”

“Oh, please,” she said. “That’s just stupid.”

“People do it all the time.”

“Not this person.” She twisted the dangling strands of her ponytail around her finger. “My life is all in place. Why would I want to turn it upside down?”

Speaking of upside-down life, he’d spent a whole lot of time in dark cellars, caves and God knows where else thinking about the baby. Her letter had said she was having a boy, right after she’d admitted she’d considered not telling him at all. That she was okay with raising the child alone and not to feel any obligation to be involved. Be well and happy. Kate, she’d signed the thing. He was well, but he hadn’t been happy for longer than he could remember.

Scratch that. He’d been happy when he was with her. But more important than either of them was his son.

“What about the baby?” he asked.

“What about him?” she answered, her eyes flashing. “J.T. is perfect. I’m taking care of him just fine.”

“In your letter you said you were okay with raising him alone, but—”

“I am,” she interrupted. “Although I don’t really remember what I said.”

He remembered. He’d had it with him when he went down, hid the paper and read it so often he’d memorized every word while he’d been detained.

“You’re looking pretty intense,” she said warily.

“Just thinking.” He leaned his forearms on the table. “Wouldn’t you like some help with the baby?”

“I don’t need help. Not from you.”

“I’m J.T.’s father.”

“That’s a fact. And here’s another one. You dumped me.”

“I didn’t know you were pregnant.”

“Okay. But your gut instinct was to walk away from me. Now I’m supposed to believe that I’m the woman of your dreams because I had your baby?” She laughed, but there was no humor in it. “I don’t think so.”

“I was being deployed. It wasn’t fair to ask you to wait.”

“You didn’t ask. You didn’t give me a chance to decide if I wanted to wait for you. You just assumed and didn’t give a rat’s behind about how I felt. It was selfish.”

Was that hurt in her eyes? He’d walked away because it was better for him, so he’d take responsibility for the selfish part. But he hadn’t meant to hurt her. He’d been doing what was best for both of them.

If best was not being able to forget her, then his strategy had been a rousing success. If aching to feel her in his arms and see her bright smile and deep dimples was optimum, then his course of action had been a clear victory. If best was beating back the yearning to contact her, then he’d been right on.

The biggest hell of captivity, even worse than the beatings and losing another marine, was not being able to tell her he wanted his son. He wanted to be obligated, to be involved. To pick up where he’d walked out and start fresh. Who knows? They might have been married now. But judging by the resentment in her eyes and the edge to her voice, it was going to be an uphill battle.

“That time—Us—It’s history,” he said.

“And the past is where it’s going to stay. Because the thing about you being selfish is that now I know. There’s no taking it back. And it’s a red flag for me that you’re probably not very good marriage material.”

“Now who’s assuming?”

“It’s not an assumption if you’ve got history to back it up.”

He ran his fingers through his hair. It was longer than military issue now and felt weird, different. Kind of like this conversation. He’d dug himself a foxhole and now he had to fight his way out of it.

“The most important thing is J.T.”

She nodded. “I agree.”

“He needs a mother and a father.”

“And he’s got one of each. There’s no reason to get wild and do something stupid.”

“I want to be there for him,” Joe said.

He’d nearly gone crazy, bound and blindfolded somewhere in the bowels of Afghanistan, knowing he was not only MIA as far as the military was concerned, but also during Kate’s pregnancy and the birth of his child. Not knowing if Kate and the baby were okay. He couldn’t be involved then because fate got in his way. But now he’d go to the mat with fate for the chance to know his son.