Belinda Barnes - His Special Delivery

James winked at a redhead two tables over. “Are you okay with that?”

“You mean do I want to fight for her?”

At James’s nod, Cal shook his head. “No. There’s no point.”

“What do your folks have to say about all this?”

“Nothing yet. They were catching a flight to France right after the wedding.”

Cal knew they would blame him for this mess with Tiffany, just as he knew his mother would double her efforts to find him a suitable wife—meaning one whose family came from old money.

They could shove their rules, social register, dinner parties and their efforts to run his life. He’d never walk away from the only thing that made him happy. He couldn’t imagine his life without his veterinary practice. He’d never give it up—not to please his manipulating parents or the beautiful model whose so-called love came at a price he hadn’t been willing to pay.

“I knew Tiff and I disagreed on almost everything,” he said, “but I’d fooled myself into believing things might work. I’m tired of it all. I’m tired of trying. Tired of failing. And I’m tired of always being the one who has to change.”

James sent him a questioning look. “You sure?”

“I mean it. I’m through trying to be what everyone else wants. Look where it’s gotten me. From now on, I’m doing what I want, when I want. To hell with everybody else.”

The beeper hanging on Cal’s belt vibrated. He tilted his pager at an angle so he could see the message. Flipping open his cellular phone, he punched in the number.

When a nurse from the hospital answered, he said, “This is Cal Tucker.”

“Dr. Tucker, this is Mercy Hospital. Dr. Moore asked me to call you.”

Cal’s gut clenched as tightly as his grip on the phone. “Why?”

“There’s a problem with the baby.”

“Put me through to Sara.” Without hesitation, Cal stood and grabbed his denim jacket.

“I’m sorry, Dr. Tucker, we had to sedate her.”

“I’m on my way.” Cal closed the phone and shoved it in the holster at his hip.

“What’s wrong?” James asked.

“I’ve got to go. I feel responsible.” A strange heaviness filled Cal’s chest. He could still feel the slight weight of Jessie’s tiny body in his palms when she’d slid from Sara’s body. A weight that had lodged itself in his heart.

“Who is Sara?”

“I can’t talk about it now.” Cal grabbed his Resistol off the table. “Look, I’d planned on coming back to work since the wedding fell through, but something has come up. I think I’ll take a couple of days off if you can manage the clinic.”

James stood. “No sweat.”

Cal pushed his hat down low on his brow and headed out the door, jamming a fist through the sleeve of his jacket as he went.

He hated the fear that twisted his gut and knew he had no choice but to go. Sara needed him. Jessie needed him. And he needed to know if he was responsible for Jessie’s problem.

Cal brushed a chestnut curl off Sara’s forehead as she lay sleeping in the hospital bed. His gaze traced the contour of her smooth jaw, followed by his fingertip.

The voice of the hospital operator paging someone brought him back to reality. Realizing he’d touched Sara, he frowned and pulled away, forcing himself across the room. He stared out the windows into the night, its inky blackness broken here and there by the dim glow of streetlights. The heater kicked on and the whir of the fan blowing warm air through the vents interrupted the room’s stillness.

If only he had news about the baby, something to give Sara hope and reassurance when she woke.

When she stirred in her sleep and blinked, he returned to the side of her bed. Her green eyes fluttered, then opened. Sara stared at him, and Cal knew from the way she squinted that she still fought the lingering effects of the sedative.

“It’s okay, Sara. I’m here.” Cal sat on the edge of her bed and leaned toward her so she could see him.

“Oh, Cal.” Her voice cracked. “How did you know?”

“The hospital called.”

Her bottom lip trembled, and she clutched his hands as if fearing he would leave. Her frantic grip loosened after a moment, but when he tried to pull away, she grabbed at his shirtfront. “Have they told you anything about Jessica? She’s the only thing I have. I can’t lose her. I can’t.”

The urge to take Sara in his arms and hold her caught him off guard. He knew he shouldn’t, but that’s exactly what he did. He had to do something to ease her pain before it consumed him.

He held her tight. “I won’t leave until I see the doctor, until we have some answers.” Cal buried his nose in the curls that framed her face and inhaled her sweetness.

When he tried to pull away, she wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him. Her closeness burned him. He felt like an ice-cream cone left out in the hot Texas sun.

Cal knew he should push Sara away, but couldn’t, not when she needed him. For now, he’d hold her, reassure her, for as long as she wanted. It was the least he could do.

Pressed against her, he became aware of the pounding of her heart and the thrust of her breasts. Irritated with himself, he pulled back. She didn’t try to hold him, the sedative once again lowering her eyelids.

Cal had never received a jolt quite like this. He couldn’t understand his profound reaction. One more thing in his life gone out of control. He didn’t like the way Sara made him feel…as if his decision to remain indifferent was a rope that gave way one strand at a time. Cal stood and moved once more to the window. He’d been okay with her needing him, but he had no business craving to be with her, to protect her. Sara deserved more than what he could give her, yet he couldn’t help but wonder about the faceless man who’d walked out on her and their unborn child. Cal itched to get his hands on the jerk, and that bothered him as much as the things Sara made him feel.

Sara…She embodied everything he’d been denied his whole life and made him want things he couldn’t have.

Cal glanced over his shoulder, his body still attuned to her nearness, and swore. Something about Sara drew him. But he wouldn’t make another mistake, so he headed for the door.

Cal paced outside the neonatal isolation unit. He’d walked this strip of gray tile for three hours now, waiting to hear something about Jessie.

He needed to see if Sara still slept, but kept putting it off, not wanting to face her until he had news about the baby. Also, he had to rein in the feelings that had nothing to do with wanting to protect her and the baby.

An admissions clerk swished toward him. She stuck a clipboard under his nose. “We need your signature on these forms, Dr. Tucker.”

The clerk’s stiff demeanor annoyed Cal. “What are they?”

“Routine forms for the administration office. They’re acknowledgment of your responsibility to pay.” She thrust a pen toward him.

He shook his head. “Sara needs to sign those.”

The doors beside him burst open. A short, gray-haired man tugged down the blue mask covering his mouth and nose and let it hang around his neck. Glancing at Cal, he asked, “Dr. Tucker?”

Tension knotted Cal’s shoulders. “Yes.”

The clerk cleared her throat as she blocked Cal’s path. “Your signature, please.”

Cal glanced toward the doctor, then snatched the pen from the irritating clerk.

Once he’d scrawled his name on the lines indicated, the clerk took the clipboard and pen and slipped away.

The man in scrubs extended his hand toward Cal. “I understand you performed the delivery on the side of the road.”

Cal shook the offered hand. “I didn’t have much choice. How is Jessie?”

“She’s fine. You’ve got yourself a real fighter in there.”

Cal wondered at the sense of pride that filled him. “What happened?”

“She aspirated amniotic fluid during the delivery, which caused her some difficulty breathing. We want to observe her closely for a couple of hours. If all continues to go well, she can go home the day after tomorrow.”

Relief rushed through Cal, but nagging doubts still troubled him. “Did I do something wrong that caused this trouble?”

The doctor patted Cal’s shoulder. “No, son. You did a fine job. It just happens sometimes.”

The guilt he’d struggled with since the nurse’s call eased. “Will there be any lingering problems from this?”

“It’s hard to tell this soon. Sometimes there are some respiratory problems for a while. Each case is different. Just keep a close eye on her and call her pediatrician if she has any trouble.”

“Thanks.” After the doctor left, Cal headed for Sara’s room, suddenly anxious to tell her the good news.

He heard the commotion before he rounded the corner. Sara staggered toward him, pushing her IV pole, clearing a path down the hall, a nurse hot on her heels.

The nurse tried to bar Sara’s way. “You’ve got to go back to your room.”

Sara glanced at Cal, a look of utter torment and despair on her face. Her soft bottom lip trembled. Tears streamed down her freckled cheeks and dripped from her chin.

Suddenly she was in his arms. He didn’t know how it had happened, only that she was there. Cal absorbed the sobs that racked her body and hugged her tightly, bending down to bury his face in her soft hair. He would leave in a moment, but for now… “Shh, Sara, it’s okay.”

He straightened, trying to ignore how good she felt pressed against him. Cal wanted to pull back so he wouldn’t feel her softness, but he couldn’t. Instead, he shifted from one foot to the other and did his best to comfort her while ignoring his body’s immediate response to her nearness.

“Can you talk with her, please?” the nurse asked. “She’s still under sedation and too unsteady to be out here.” Her tone softened. “I know the waiting is difficult, but as soon as we hear something about the child’s condition, we’ll let you know.”

“It’s okay,” Cal said. “I’ll take her to her room.” He reached for Sara’s elbow, but she shoved his hand away, surprising him with her strength.

“Get away from me. I’m not budging until someone tells me what’s going on with my baby.”

She hobbled around him, wincing as she went. Cal turned in time to catch the tail end of her gaping hospital gown, trying not to notice her long, coltish legs as he pulled her to a stop. “Sara, wait. I just left the doctor.”

She spun to face him, catching the back of her gown to hold it closed. “How is she?”

“Jessie’s fine. Now, let’s go back to your room, and I’ll tell you everything.”

Her lower lip trembled again, and she walked back into his arms. Cal held her against him and settled his chin on the top of her head. Her shoulders shook, and he patted her awkwardly, stirring the air, which teased his nostrils with her sweetness.

He shouldn’t want to hold her. He shouldn’t need to comfort her. And he shouldn’t like it this blasted much.

“Come on, Sara. Let’s get you back to bed.” The sight of this strong woman coming all undone, a woman who had just gone through natural childbirth on the side of the road, touched something deep inside him.

Sara tipped her head back to meet his gaze. “I have to see her, to touch her. Please, Cal, I need to know she’s okay.” The soft, warm quality of her voice beckoned him.

Cal took a step back and cleared his throat. “The doctor wants to keep Jessie under close observation for a few more hours. When it’s safe, they’ll bring her to you. But we have to go back to your room. That’s where they’ll call.”