Rolia Kama - The path to the stars

It’s already one o’clock in the morning, I need to go to bed to rest my body, I don’t know what tomorrow is waiting for me. I climbed into my bunk and looked out the window at the street. The camera is located on the second floor of the women’s building, and opposite, at a distance of 300 meters, a three-story men’s building. From the third floor of the men’s building at night, the women’s camera is visible at a glance. On the contrary, the picture was terrible. Through the barred Windows in the opposite building, black, moving shapes were visible. It was like black creatures who have been placed in cells. Ropes ran from the cell Windows up, down, and into neighboring buildings. The moonlight fell on the ropes, and I imagined a huge spider’s web encircling the prison. I don’t want to, I don’t want to see it, I looked up at the sky. It was a beautiful cloudless, starry night.

The Windows are constantly opening because of the road, so it’s cold. I’m a cold person myself, predisposed to colds. I covered myself with a blanket and a fur coat and fell asleep.

In the morning of the next day, before checking, I am handed two tubes of wrapped papers. I’m asking:

– What is it?»

– These are sentences, they ask you to write complaints about them. You need to untie it and put it in your room, or they’ll take it away during the search. On the road you stay, your task is to write a complaint – said to me Chaihana. So my life in prison began.

How I now regret that I was carried away by work, study, and myself. Forgive me, my dears, for paying so little attention to you. I didn’t even know how to use appliances. And prison is a cruel world for survival, intrigues from all sides, in order to break and humiliate a person. Here is a completely different layer of the population, who do not understand and do not explain the whole essence of the terrible accusation, just as I do not understand others, everyone has their own pain.

Today is December 15. A week after my arrest, you had a stroke and your legs gave out. My daughter had to take a sabbatical. All the care of you and my parents has fallen on her, my poor girl.

Oh, how my heart aches, it’s impossible to breathe, my heart breaks. I can’t breathe. Calmly, we must live, we must breathe, breathe. A woman is sitting across from me, and I mentally ask her to look at me, and she does.

– What’s the matter with you? I’ll get some water.

I repeat in my mind: breathe, breathe, everything is fine. Dad, what was that, an attack?! You know I’ve been born with a weak heart. I’ve never had such pain. A year later, my cardiologist told me that I had suffered a microinfarction.

During my first time in prison, I was internally judgmental of prisoners for their crimes. I thought that we accidentally «wandered» here, they will soon sort it out and let us go, after all, we do not live in the years of repression. Prisoners of Stalin’s repression probably thought the same. The history of the state, like karma, repeats itself. It is hard to believe that all this lawlessness is happening in modern democratic Russia, or rather, in the Republic that is part of Russia.

Thanks to my legal education, Anya and I helped others in the investigation and appeal of the sentence, some of them reduced the term, changed the qualification of the crime to a more lenient one, and some were released or acquitted. The real professionalism of investigators and judges is falling. Of course, it is much easier to beat out a confession and fabricate evidence, the authorities will cover up, as the statistics of disclosure improve. Thus, I got to know the unknown life of another layer of the population, I got to know all the rot and arrogance of law enforcement agencies that take advantage of a person’s legal ignorance to raise the detection rate of crimes and get a promotion for successfully solving a case for a more serious crime.

After a month, we were fed rotten fish, and instead of bread, we were given spoiled army cookies, the batteries were barely warm. They were saved by broadcasts from home, but this was very little, since most of the prisoners are beggars. As usual, criminal offences are mostly committed by the lower class of the population. They did not take off their outer clothing, and went to bed with shoes on, two people on the same bed to keep each other warm.

Now we have three mentally ill women in our cell. Olya arrived from the court, was sentenced to a medical term. This young beautiful girl stabbed a friend with whom she lived in the same room in a boarding school for the mentally ill.

Tanya and Sveta came to the party (this is when they are kicked out of the cell or the operative will mix it up) from other cells. They have no confirmation of mental illness. Tanya is under investigation, beat a drunk neighbor to death. Sveta was sentenced to 15 years, stabbed two sleeping friends who abused her. Psychological examination due to the lack of data in the file of mentally ill people found them sane. I found out that these two were in the category of patients who had to visit a psychiatric hospital on their own once a year and undergo inpatient treatment. If such patients did not come to the hospital for a year, they were removed from the register of mental patients, and outpatient records were sent to the archive.

At my (Tanya’s) request, the investigator requested an outpatient card from the archives of the district hospital. After receiving confirmation of her mental illness, she was sent for treatment.

Sveta was sentenced to a real term with serving a sentence in a penal colony due to lack of professionalism or negligence of the investigation and the court. There Sveta will finally go mad and die.

Constant quarrels with these patients strain the psychological atmosphere in the cell. One night Olga attacked Tanya, then began banging her head on the floor. I had to tie her up completely and keep her there until morning. Employees do not pay attention, they ask us to calm them down.

One day at 5 o’clock in the morning, I Wake up from the impact of iron on my bed, open my eyes, and there is a freeze frame. Laughter and grief. Sveta is standing with her hand raised, and in her hand is an iron Cup. She looks at me with fear and guilt. On the other side is Tanya, bent over with her hand raised above her head. Apparently, Light swung to hit the mug, and Tanya wanted to protect herself from the blow. I show them signs to calm down, that I’m tired and I need to sleep, and they calm down. They were friendly to me.

I think, God forbid, there will be a murder in the cell. Usually on the morning Balanda road workers close the roads, and those on duty in the cell Wake up. These sick women should not be left unattended. Tanya is aggressive compared to others.

While in prison, I learned that the criminal world in the Republic is quite organized and even controls some part of the economy. They live very well with the prison administration. Criminals monitor order, Finance landscaping, and the administration allows you to drive the road at night and use phones.

One phone was attached to each camera. I was surprised that the phone was often called by convicted men who were serving their sentences in Russian colonies. Well, what can I say, well done and many thanks to the criminal world that I had the opportunity to communicate with my family. In addition, there is a thieves ' hostel, from which they necessarily supply women for the stage to the colony. Provide for children born in prison. I have seen three cases of women giving birth and being held in prison with children. One of them went to the colony with a child. My dear, I told you about her. Currently, she is doing well, got a job and took her son from the boarding school.

I have been in prison for three months now. The clerk on duty down the hall knocked on the door and peered through the peephole.

– Kama, get ready for the investigation.

«Wait, I’ll get dressed.»

Even in prison, I tried to look after myself, dress appropriately for my status. Besides, I didn’t want to look depressed or broken in front of the investigators. I put on a black wool dress with short sleeves, just below the knees. The collar and lower part of the dress were in a mottled pattern. One of my favorite dresses. It fits my beautiful figure. Wear nylon stockings in light and the ankle boots, the front part of the black husky, middle of the dark purple skin, back also likes leather and black bow. The length of my hair was up to the elbow, so I could afford to make a ponytail with an elastic band and tuck it in like a bump. She picked up a folder of papers and knocked on the door. Prison officers towards me and Ana have always been treated with respect and civility, as we are to them.

«I’m ready.»

The attendant and attendant were waiting for me outside the door. I heard that Anya was also ordered, so I went out of the cell and stood facing the wall, waiting.

«Wait,» the attendant said, and went to the next cell:

«Are you ready?»

– Yes.

Anya comes out of the cell. She’s a little taller than me, built like me. She is wearing a grey wool turtleneck and dark grey classic trousers, pressed into an arrow. Wavy thick hair with a short hairstyle. Thick lashes and brows, eyes with an open slit, a straight nose and neat lips. We said Hello, and I said,

– I have a court tomorrow to consider my complaint about the inaction of the investigation.

– I wrote a complaint to the Prosecutor General’s office. Finally, some action has been taken, if called.

We talked to her as we went along. When they came to the bars of a large corridor, they saw that it was filled with male prisoners. Today was a stage visit to the local colony. When the prison staff saw us, they started shouting at the prisoners:

– Stand aside, face the wall, hands behind your head, sit on the courts.

The middle of the corridor was cleared so that we could pass. Where else can you see such a picture, when beautiful women are walking down a long corridor, and a crowd of convicted criminals squats, opening the way for them. I slowed down a little, I think, let them at least please their eyes, excite their imagination.

On the first floor, all the boxes were occupied, and we were left standing in the General corridor against the wall. At this time, two investigators, a girl and a man, were also in the corridor waiting for the release of the investigative office. Anya and I spoke Russian. Apparently, these two investigators thought that we do not understand the Tuvan language at all. The man, looking at us with interest, said:

– Everyone says that the women of this criminal case are urban, smart and beautiful. Yes, indeed, they are good, and you can not say that the murder was committed.

The young woman’s face turned red at her colleague’s words.

– They don’t have anything to do in the cell, so they’re showing off, they don’t work like me.

The man looked at her in disbelief as she looked at us, then pulled away. The girl’s face is pretty, but her body is running, requires sports exercises, especially in the abdomen. The national trait of the bulk of Tuvan women of my age is a low butt and a full belly. The later generation, especially the young girls of today, are beautiful in everything.

The young investigator Okhemchik wanted to acquaint us with the conclusion of the examination and the Protocol of identification without the presence of lawyers. In conclusion, it was stated that the shape of the skull belongs to the Caucasian race. According to the identification Protocol, the body was identified by the photo of the mother of the victim, according to the last name, tuvinka. Accordingly, we refused to get acquainted without lawyers. It was necessary to protest these documents.