Гэрет Уильямс - Темное, кривое зеркало. Том 5 : Средь звезд, подобно гигантам

"If there is, it will be men like him who start it." w i

"No," Kats said softly. "I wish that were true, but it is not. The truth is, people like you started this. People like you, and people like me. The Inquisitors, the Dark Star fleets, the witch hunts, what you did to the Drazi and the Centauri…. And people like me, for not standing up and saying 'this is wrong'. One of the Inquisitors tortured me for information about Sinoval, but when he left I did not come to you and protest about their very existence. I hid, too afraid of war and what it would bring. I should have spoken up long before." l l

"All we wanted was peace. I was…. afraid, just as you were. I thought that one or two tiny liberties removed wouldn't matter. But in the end we took away too much and what remained? Was there any other way? Was there anything we could have done differently?" o b

"Far too many things, but I do not know if any of them would have led to a different outcome." e y

"It is too late to know now." u s

"No," Kats said firmly. "We are not at war yet, and it is not too late. We can speak of peace and we can work together. We can show the angry and the dispossessed that the Vorlons are to blame, and not the Alliance as a whole. We can punish the guilty, those who planned and enacted this, and we can hold the Alliance together." y o

"Do you truly believe that?" u w

"I would not be here if I did not." i l

Susan Ivanova was angry and upset and a mass of conflicting emotions. Most of all, she wanted either a drink, or to hit someone. Possibly both. l o

The air was strange, thick and aromatic. It almost choked her, but from the way the Tuchanq moved and smiled it might have been the finest perfume. The ground was soft, almost muddy, but they bounded across it like children playing. b e

And the Song seemed to echo from every rock, every building, every molecule of air. Wherever she turned, she could hear it, and it pulled at her. y u

Sinoval was out there somewhere, talking to nuViel Roon or the others, basking in their hero — worship. Susan had no doubt that any of them would have died if he asked them to. And they would. He was going to lead them to war and get every one of them massacred. s y

There was so much happiness everywhere. Her cynical soul hated the idea, but especially now. A world had died. Billions of people had been killed. An entire race had now lost their home. Was this any time for celebration? o u

But the Tuchanq probably still thought the Narns deserved it. They were probably celebrating the destruction of Narn as much as the restoration of their home. Whatever the Narns had done, they did not deserve that. And what of the innocent, what of the children and the unborn, and those now to be born homeless and rootless? Did they deserve this? w i

She was hungry and thirsty and tired of all the dark thoughts swirling around in her mind. Sinoval's song had been…. almost painful in its intensity and power. He had seemed completely unmoved by it, but it had touched her. It had made her want to cry, or cry out, or rejoice or fight or…. any one of a number of things. She had remembered giving her brother her earring, joking with Laurel, talking with David long into the night. She had remembered fear and pain and misery and the even greater pain of good times that would never return. l l

And Sinoval, of course, had felt nothing. He was an emotional rapist, no better and no worse. o b

And he was all the galaxy could muster? Shouldn't the saviour of the galaxy actually care about what he was saving? Shouldn't a hero at least have heroic intentions? Despite all she had tried to do, Sinoval was fighting the Vorlons because he wanted to. To him this had nothing to do with what was right or wrong. It was all just a game. He was just a boy playing with toy soldiers which just happened to walk and talk and breathe and live and dream. e y

Her walk brought her back to where she had started. Sinoval was standing in what was once again the town square, talking to nuViel Roon and the other leaders. u s

"…. will fight for you," nuViel Roon was saying. "Give the word and we will send every life we have to die for you." y o

"No," Sinoval said calmly. "That may be required of you, but not yet. Rebuild your world and your cities. Fight to defend yourselves, if any attack you, but do not go on the offensive. Not yet. Not until the time is right. I will call for you when I need you, and rest assured, I will never forget you. But for now, the greatest thing you can do is rebuild your world and your homes." u w

"We will never forget you, Saviour," one of the others said. "We will always serve you." i l

Sickened, Susan wandered away. l o

Some time later, she did not know exactly how long, she found herself with him on the pinnacle, watching the planet of Tuchanq fade away, a live world once again, but so very briefly, soon to be consumed again by war. b e

"So," she said. "When are you going to bring them into this?" There was a definite bitterness in her words. She wanted him to know just how disgusted she was with his games. y u

"Never," he replied, still looking at the planet. s y

"What? But you said…." o u

"I know what I said. I will not deny that I could use their fleet, insignificant though it is, but I will cope without them. They are not warriors, and this is not their war. To the giants who fill the skies the Tuchanq are no more than insects, beneath their attention. If I do not involve them, if they remain in their world and their system, the Vorlons will not notice them either. w i

"The Vorlons destroyed a world. I restored one. For everything they do, I must react to counter it. A time is coming when that will not be possible, and I will have to act against them directly. The Tuchanq would be crushed if I involved them in that. l l

"No, let them live. Let them enjoy their existence, in the knowledge that there is so much worse that could befall them. Let them worship me if they like. o b

"But I will not throw children into battle. They will wait forever for a call that will never come." e y

Susan looked at him, breathing out slowly. She wrapped her arms tightly around herself. u s

"So," she said. "What now?" y o

"There are a few people I need to contact. I need to gather all my agents. The time for subtlety will soon be over. One of my…. friends in particular, I think you will like. u w

"But I can do that on the way. Events are rushing to a climax, threads converging at the centre of the galaxy. i l

"We set course for Babylon Five." l o

It felt different this time. b e

Usually, whenever Talia communed with the Apocalypse Box, there was an incredible rush of power. It was the feeling she imagined her ancestors must have had taking their first baby steps into space, sheer wonder of what lay beyond and utter pride in how far they had come. Whole new vistas lay stretched out before her through the Apocalypse Box, whole new realms of power. y u

This time it felt different. s y

It was cold, for one thing. An icy, chilling cold. Her body could not feel anything, but her soul felt as though she were walking in a graveyard through waist — deep mist. There was an uncanny sensation of death in the air. o u

Moving forward, she could see specks of light in the air, dancing and swirling. She recognised them as parts of the Vorlon network, just a few of the millions of trapped souls bound to it. With renewed confidence she continued forward. w i

The city appeared from nowhere in front of her. It was vast, the size of a planet, bigger. She could not even begin to comprehend the number of people who must have lived there. There were not enough zeroes to express the number. l l

Every house was a tomb. Every building a mausoleum. o b

The sky beat in slow, rhythmic cycles, brilliant bolts of crackling light flashing across the clouds. The faint specks of light from the network seemed so much fainter now. e y

You have walked too far, intoned a voice. Or rather, she supposed it was something speaking to her. If she believed in God, then He would have a voice like that. It seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere. But no God could have created anything like this. She had a feeling that everything was alive, a travesty of life, twitching, shambling death given life. u s

"Are you the spirit within the Box?" she asked. y o

We are more than you can comprehend. The vessel was one of many we seeded throughout your galaxy, adrift in the in — between, on lost, abandoned worlds among shrines to the dead.

A flicker of light appeared before her, and it took form. She had caught brief, agonising glimpses of the Vorlons during her passage through the network. They were beautiful and angelic, formed of light and wonder. She knew that was only an illusion, but it was a powerful image all the same. u w

This was no angel. Or rather, it was what an angel would become if it turned beauty to ugliness, love to hatred, life to death. Every extreme reversed. i l

Some worshipped us, continued the voice. I t has always been so. Your kind has always looked to the stars and to what lies beyond. When you find us, you always bend in worship. We are what lies beyond. We were the first in our dimension to grow to life. We were perfect, the blessed, and all that came after was but a shadow before us. We gained the secrets of eternity and we shared them with everything else in our existence. Races and worlds and stars all died before us.

Talia felt the cold wind batter at her, and it was all she could do to hear the meaning in the words. The voice was so overwhelming, so angry and harsh and yet so filled with…. love, love that was so strong it had become hatred. l o

We tried before to enter your existence, yours and all the others. Some admitted us, but the gateway was closed before we could fully emerge. Some of that race, who deemed themselves so strong and so knowledgeable, worshipped us as all do, and they remained in secret, in the shadows, preparing. And now they have bargained and sacrificed all that they have.

All we had to do was wait, and our patience is as eternal as death itself.

They have admitted us to this dimension, as you have. Your pitiful mortal existence can know nothing more sublime than death itself, and so we shall permit you to remain, to watch as we bless your race.

And all others.

None could stand against us in our dimension. Do you think you can stand against us when we come for you?

Talia threw her head back, shaking and screaming and trembling. The lights still blazed in the sky, but they seemed so faint. The network was there, but it seemed so weak. These things had infiltrated it, been allowed to enter it by the Vorlons. b e

Al was there. y u

She stumbled backwards, staring up into the sky. s y

"Help me!"

There was no one to help him now. He was alone. o u

If he had to concede it to himself (and if he could not trust himself, whom could he trust?) he would admit that he had always been alone. That was the burden of power and responsibility. You could not regard those who followed you as real people with real lives. That way lay madness. w i