Gail Martin - In His Eyes

He strode past the smaller room and stood outside Caitlin’s door. “So how’s it going?” he asked as he stepped inside.

Ellene was sitting on the corner of the bed while Caitlin stood in the middle of the room, pointing toward the closet.

“Are you telling Ellene what you want up here?”

“I don’t want anything. I told you.” Her piercing voice was followed by the sweep of her hand across a night table. The contents clattered to the floor. “You never listen to me. I’m telling her what the other girl wants.”

“What other girl?” he asked.

The child’s face darkened to crimson as she shook her finger at him. “The girl Ellene said who’ll live in this house.”

“That’s enough, Caitlin.” Connor struggled to keep his voice calm. He stepped forward, catching her by the arm and drawing her to his side. “I’m sorry. I forgot, but you can’t be rude like this.”

Ellene rose from the bed and edged toward the door, looking uneasy. “I’ll be downstairs.”

He returned his attention to Caitlin, embarrassed that Ellene had to see his daughter’s worst behavior. He closed his eyes a minute to gather his thoughts. “I can’t let you treat an adult this way, Caitlin. If I were mean to you then I might deserve this, but I love you, and I only want the best for you.”

Her belligerent look faded as tears pooled in her eyes and she reached up for him to lift her into his arms. She tilted her head forward and rested her chin on his shoulder, tears flowing onto his shirt. His chest heaved with sadness as he cuddled his daughter. Lately she’d changed from a shy, quiet child to a withdrawn, angry one.

Connor held Caitlin in his arms, smelling the lemony scent of her shampoo mingled with the chocolate aroma on her breath. After she quieted he settled her on the bed and stood beside her, caressing her hair while his vision blurred from the moisture in his own eyes.

What could he do? He wanted to invest in a new business—his own business—and he couldn’t do that without more financing. His house in the Detroit suburbs would bring a good price and help start his business and still pay for renovations on the cottage. He’d do anything to make Caitlin content, but he didn’t think the house or cabin had anything to do with it. Caitlin needed attention. She needed love, and he couldn’t seem to give her enough of either.

“I want you to stay here until you feel like being more friendly. Ellene is here on business, and I have to talk with her.”

Caitlin didn’t respond. He shook his head and turned to the stairs.

“What kind of business?”

Her soft voice surprised him, and he turned toward her. “She’s a building contractor.”

“What’s that?” She rolled over to face him.

Connor’s chest tightened seeing her confused face. “She’s a person who helps remodel a business or a house. She helps people decide which rooms to add or how to change them.”

Caitlin frowned. “But she seems like your friend.”

“I’ve known her and her father for many years.”

“She has a daddy, too?”

“Yes. Mr. Bordini.”

“And a mommy?”

A lump caught in Connor’s throat. “Yes.”

“I thought so.”

Fighting a lump in his throat, Connor could only nod.

Caitlin rolled back to face the wall.

“I’ll talk to you later, sweetheart,” he said, heading once again for the staircase.

“I know. You got business,” she mumbled.

Business. Yes, he had business with Ellene, but the word seemed so incompatible with the deeper relationship they’d once had. Seeing her now brought back those old unpleasant feelings. No surprise, really. Their parting had been shocking to him. He wondered if she’d ever realized how devastated he’d been. It hadn’t been what he’d wanted, but pride and stubbornness had stopped him from begging her to take back the ring. He’d walked away.

Things happen for a reason, and later he’d realized the breakup had probably been for the best. Since Connor hadn’t been a strong Christian then, he’d feared he could never meet her parents’ expectations or make Ellene happy. Their relationship, he worried, would have brought heartache for everyone.

At the bottom of the stairs, Connor drew in a lengthy breath, then stepped into the room.

Ellene stood by the doorway, looking through the window into the porch.

“Today isn’t a good day for Caitlin.”

When he spoke, she turned to face him. “It’s probably because I’m here.” She lifted a finger and drew it around a lock of hair.

“It’s not that.” He wanted to explain, but he didn’t have the answer himself. It was so many things.

She seemed to wait, and when he didn’t add to his comment, she glanced at her watch. “It’s getting late. I should finish up here and get on my way.”

His pulse skipped as she stepped closer to him. “By the time we finish, it’ll be getting dark. How about staying for dinner?”

She hesitated, then stiffened. “No, Connor, but thanks. Let’s get started. I would really like to finish before dark. It’s a long drive home.”

Connor feared he’d pushed too hard, and he knew Ellene too well. When she meant business, that was it.

A sarcastic tone edged his words. “Okay, let’s get this finished.”

After an hour of talking about the cabin, Ellene settled onto one of Connor’s dining-room chairs and lifted the lid on her laptop. She opened her software program and began pulling together the renovation details they’d discussed.

Connor had finally left her alone while he worked at the kitchen counter, probably preparing their evening meal. She glanced at him occasionally, seeing him stare into the refrigerator and study the inside of the pantry. She forced herself to concentrate. She needed to input the figures and ideas they’d discussed, then get on the road. The trip home would take over an hour even without the weekday traffic, and the longer she stayed the more confused she became. For so many years, she’d dragged around her negative attitude about Connor, yet today he’d even made her laugh.

She studied the yellow legal pad as a garbled notation hopped from the page. “You’re willing to lose four feet of the great room to expand the bathroom and bedroom downstairs. Is that what we agreed? I can’t read my notes.”

“Right. If we make the porch a year-round room, I can spread the sitting area out even more, and we’ll leave the far end of the porch as it is.” He glanced her way. “Is that right?”

“The last twelve feet will remain a screened-in porch. Correct.” Her fingers flew across the keyboard, and she only noticed Caitlin when her shadow fell over her scribbled notes.

The girl leaned over her shoulder and looked at the screen. “What are you doing?”

“I’m typing information.”

“Can I type?”

“I’m working right now, Caitlin, but I know computers are fun. They have all kinds of information and even programs for kids.”

Caitlin drew back. “I know.”

Ellene chuckled at her blunt retort.

The little girl touched the edge of the keyboard. “We have computers at my school.”

“Computers are the backbone of communication.”

Caitlin’s face screwed into a disbelieving look. “Computers don’t have backbone. People do.”

Ellene laughed and glanced at Connor who sent her a wry smile. “I mean, it’s very important in business. We can talk with people all over the world.”

Caitlin lifted her eyebrows. “Talk?”

“Not talk, but write to people or read information from other countries.”

“On e-mail,” Caitlin said.

The child’s simple response made Ellene grimace at her lack of experience talking with children.

Caitlin faced Connor. “Daddy, we should get a computer for home, too.”

He arched an eyebrow. “Maybe we should, but Caitlin, right now, you shouldn’t bother Ellene.”

“It’s okay,” But was it? Ellene felt her heartstrings tangling around the little girl. She needed to remain uninvolved before she got hurt again.

Caitlin leaned closer to the monitor. “Do you have games on your computer?”

“A few.” Ellene paused a moment to shoo her away, then thought better of it and hit the minimize button. “This is the desktop. See this right here.” She cringed suspecting Caitlin knew about the desktop.

Caitlin nodded as Ellene clicked an icon. A noise hummed and clicked as a machine came onto the screen while Caitlin giggled.

“What’s that?” the child asked, pressing her finger against the monitor.

“It’s pinball. You’re too young for this game, but adults like it.”

Caitlin leaned closer, watching Ellene shoot the ball. “We don’t have games like that at school.”

The sound pulled Connor from the kitchen area, and he wandered to her side and leaned over, viewing the screen. “I’ve never played computer games.”

“You’re kidding,” Ellene said. “What world do you live in?” Silence hung between them for a moment.

“The world of a single dad.”

Her stomach knotted, getting his message.

“Look,” she said, hoping to ease the uncomfortable moment. “Here are the keys to use the flippers and bumpers, and you use the space bar to shoot the ball.”

Caitlin giggled as Ellene’s ball skittered across the screen, bouncing into a worm hole and rattling against the bumpers. She gave the ball another whack, and it rebounded, sending her score upward.

“My turn!” Connor said, then chuckled at himself. “Could I try?”

She grinned at the childlike way he’d requested a chance to play, and she rose, allowing him to slip into the chair. He tested the keys, getting used to the flippers, before he began his turn. When he shot the first ball, he missed, and it vanished down the chute. No score.

He gave her a silly grin while his knee tapped as he pushed the space key that triggered the ball into the playing field.

Ellene forgot herself, watching him play the game and delighting in Caitlin’s amazement. But, noticing the clock hands, she realized too much time had slipped away. She’d let down her guard and had gotten caught up in Connor’s company. That wasn’t supposed to happen.

She touched Connor’s shoulder, aware of the muscles that rolled beneath her palm. “I need to get going, Connor. I have to break up your fun.”

He halted and dropped his hand from the keyboard. “Sorry. I got carried away.”

Caitlin slipped her arm around his shoulder. “Get us one, daddy,” she pleaded in his ear. “We can play games.”

“It keeps them busy,” Ellene said, seeing the excitement on Caitlin’s face.

Caitlin pressed her palms on Connor’s cheeks and turned his face to hers. “It keeps kids busy, Daddy.”

Ellene hid her grin.

Connor rose, and Ellene slipped back into the chair without comment.

Caitlin continued to watch her as she input the data. Ellene longed to get out of there and finish the job back in the office, but she feared she couldn’t read what she’d scribbled.

The aroma of ground meat drifted around her, and her stomach gnawed silently. She wished he’d let her leave before preparing their meal, but glancing at the time, she realized he had every right to get their dinner ready.

One notation confused her, and she stopped and reread the note. “Connor, we need to double check the porch.” She rose and headed for the doorway.

When she looked back, Connor had lowered the burner on the stove and turned to follow her. They stepped into the icy surroundings. Snowmobiles flew across the frozen channel, drawing her memory back to the large hunks of ice jamming against each other in the water as she crossed Lake St. Clair from the mainland.