Никита Капернаумов - 2018: Истероидный инцел и сталкер

>> 2992974

> а вообще это ты больной озабоченный, нормальному парню подрочить раз в день достаточно

да нихуя, это вы тут больные все, я думаю просмотр ебанутого анимэ или комп. игры так на вас влияют. ну или чем вы ещё занимаетесь. или типа всякие ваши толки тут о социоблядстве. вот на днях дочитал книжку «мартин иден» там чувак загнался на писательстве и философии и он потерял бабу и он был вобще без либидо. у него все мысли о его хуйне изыдили нормальные мужские мысли.

какбы вся эта нереальная хуйня из мозга все реальные инстинкты и выгоняет. а я всю молодость провёл вконтакте разглядывая и списываясь с девками с фейков и у меня всё норм поэтому с либидо как и должно быть. а именно так и должно быть в норме, возьмите любую книгу нормального мужицкого автора типа хэмингуэя или генри миллера, там одна ебля и бабы на уме у них. вот это по мужски. я еслиб была норм жизнь и была б баба я бы её заёб

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don’t think it’s a post on some special theme. i always write long.

i’m from russia, i think i’m already known on all the forums, imageboards, communities on VK (our analog of FB) of the RU-net as a «maniac» who is constantly looking for girls and is persistent with his spam and links to his ad, who is always being hysterical and eventually is blocked everywhere. i’m very sick of it that no one understands my psychology and i have no link-minded person with whom to share news about our situations, tips, methods.

my case has nothing to do with bullying and abuse in family. it’s just that i would have anything i wanted in childhood and when i saw that some things and abilities i couldn’t achieve (like when, at 5—6 years, i realized that i live in a shitty trap of a country and wouldn’t learn english and get to europe (i didn’t do well at school, and we got no money, so i clearly saw that i’d live forever in russia, while to get out of here had been my obsession since i was 4), or when i failed in sports due to my weak physic, but most importantly when i understood that girls didn’t and wouldn’t want me sexually (i understood it when i was about 9) while sexual intimacy with girls had ever been the most desirious thing since i first saw them) i consciously chose to lead a masochistic style of life and to «suffer» myself to death. i of course refused to go to school, at 13 they already put me into a madhouse, later my mother did all the needed routine and got me a $200 pension a month, disability, shizoaffective-disorder and all that crap, so i stay at home since 13. but i’m perfectly normal, i have no panic attacks and all that, let alone any hallucinations or delirium or thoughts on some philosophy (which is usually innate to those suffering from shizo-anything), and at 21—23 i worked as a courier, and i bought and sold flats (we had money) and i talked with people, and no one would think that i had any disorders. i don’t have any disorder, unless it be this my childish radical way of thinking. i must have what i want, i must be born in england or norway, i must be a native english speaker, i must have had a normal youth, and most of all I must right now be lying with some beatiful girl and lick her pussy which is wetting to me, a most sexual male. if i don’t have and have had all that, then i choose to suffer and to die. being an absolte mama’s boy i cannot kill myself yet, nor can i do many other things (for instance i can’t go out somewhere in the park and ask the passing girls to show me her pussies or masturbate for me (these are the items i state i look for in my ads) because i’d be risking getting into a trouble and then my mother would know about my sexual pervertish nature, which i cannot allow). so i wait for her to die, and as i do i try to find a girl on the internet who’d fullfill some of my wishes, like to walk with me in a park, or to let me hug her, to see her pussy, touch it (in latex glove, since she’d be a stranger possibly with ilnesses and i have my fingers bitten and bleeding). requirments for a candidate are quite high, i must have only the best. ideally she must have a CPE certificate (speak engligh like native) which is very rare (but not impossible. i am in love with one girl after whom i’ve stalked on the net for more than 6 years, and she has this CPE and model face features and all. she blocks me everywhere), she must read difficult and classical books, like shakespeare and all (i haven’t quite read such things myself though, i just know that it is the best, and i’d like to have read it myself (but i can’t thanks to my obsession with girls which eats all my time) and consequentley the girl to have done it either, or, like myself, at least have the ambition to do it). and she must look like my mother and other women of my life, like all those models i’ve taken a fancy to in childhood in TV. i don’t like bland faces and features. i like models, or rather i like just girls i like, who have just happened to be models, and even these of a particular type. so i have difficulty finding what i want, and i’ve had to say no to many a girl who asked if they met my standards (about 20 girls, which is many). as i knew in childhood, no girl pretty to me offers herself. only girls whose features i don’t like, all these brown-eyed plump creatures. i cannot stand that, become hysterical and self-pitying.

i’m not going to have a girlfriend, my life is already a wreck, last year i risked on purpose and lost all my (or rather my family’s) money $100k (there was no use of it, i couldn’t spend it, i’d grown deadly tired of handling it, had no motivation to do anything, my main desire in life being to have friendship and sex with a loving girl). i’m not going to prostitutes, since they wouldn’t wet to me, (i mean sexual desire. wet meaning «to piss» they of course can), and i couldn’t touch a possibly infected stranger’s body. so i don’t ask much and i don’t offer much ($200 max for a whole day of walking, talking and petty sexual mischief. but that’s a whole minimal mounthly salary in my town). i post my ad, or cunningly put in a link, wherever i go on every public page on VK, i buy new accounts, sometimes i write directly to girls, i compose songs about my wanting to commit suicide, because of my girllessness, trying to appeal to girl’s pitty (it works) and other methods.

i’ve got a high libido level, i guess. the last winter i lived alone and my perverted musturbation spells could last for 2—3 days, i mean i almost didn’t do anything except that. answering how often i do it i could justly say «sometimes i don’t do it.» i kind of couldn’t have enough of it, i just sat and tried to read english, but there was a puddle of wet on my chair all the same and it tickled on the floor, and ever my thoughts were that sex is the only thing i had lived for and had done whatever i did in life. after january i gave up any english and reading and commenced my look-for-a-girl campaign with full force. i had done it for the last seven years, but now i really mean to find somebody. i was with a girl but once, almost 7 years ago, i also found her this way, on VK, not a prostitute, an ordinary girl and i kissed her mouth, hugged her and licked her nipples for $50.

in short i don’t think about anything except girls, i don’t go out at all, spend all day either writing to girls and spamming, or trying to read or compose poetry, all this being also about girls and sex.

tired of writing, going to sleep, so

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увидел твой комент, в секс знакомствах. там какойто анон спросил почему. хотя объяву про посмотреть на какающую моя.

ну я ж написал в первом письме так и подтвердил что занимаюсь самоуничтожением, это и есть мазохизм. только тут не от выученной беспомощности (я никогда ни с кем и не пробовал знакомиться вобще. с 3ёх лет за девками просто следил). у меня расстройство из первых 2ух лет жизни. типа психологический аутизм, только в моём случае ещё и усложнённый истеризмом моим и повышенной сексуальной озабоченность. (щас как раз срусь на дваче в разделе хик. бесит меня что они все асексуалы, а я при этом тоже считаюсь хикки. получается я с ними общего не имею раз их состояние, всякие их мизантропии, не разделяю).

в моём случае ничё не делается. в 13 лет врачи написали шизоаффективное просто потому что моего диагноза нет. такие как мой диагноз это индивидуальные расстройства личности, которые каждые разные. нам просто ставят шизу под которую можно что угодно подогнать лишь бы освободить нас от армии и дать пенсию, ведь функционировать мы не способны. врачи родкам так и сказали, никакие таблетки ему не требуется, лечения нет, он просто вот таким получился. если будет негодовать и мешать окружающим можем положить в палату и накачать усыпляющими, больше нечего предложить.

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инфо

music, books, english

silly wizard, dick gaughan, steeleye span, english/scottish/irish folk, iron maiden, megadeth, bathory

Snatch (2000), Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (1998), Festen (1998), Jagten (2012), Julien Donkey-Boy (1999), The Da Vinci Code (2006), Platoon (1986), Cold Mountain (2003), Open Range (2003), Брат 1 и 2, Мастер и Маргарита (2005), Вор (1997), The Lord of the Rings, Troy (2004), Forrest Gump, Am? lie (2001), L? on (1994), Oscar (1967), Lock Up (1989), Cliffhanger (1993)

william shakespeare, alexander pushkin

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15 03 18 примерная дата. это в пабилк хочуобнимать

мне на заблокированом петровиче как минимум 4 девки в прошедшие выходные обещали показать письку на этой неделе. чё не пишите? блин тыща рублей целых. если ещё чегонибудь покажите то ещё доплачу.

а пока, намереваясь образовываться в теме греции как уже давно хотел и темболе раз даша там в грецию ездила недавно и тоже наверное интересуется ей, решил тут начать с прочтения античного и эротичного (естетственно) романа называется дафнис и хлоя ссылкаs-ru.wikipedia.org/wiki/Дафнис_и_Хлоя